Hello,
It's been a while. I heard you have cancer. That sucks. I feel pretty bad about that. Not because you're my grandma, but because cancer is a horrible thing for anyone to deal with.
It's too bad that it took something so horrible for you to want to see your long-lost daughters and other grandchildren and great-grandchildren again.
I know that my mom went to see you, probably a little skeptical, but maybe hoping that you would want to actually treat her as your daughter again. I hear that things didn't go too well with that. Being asked to plan your mother's funeral after not really having a mother for a long time........well that's not exactly the ice-breaker I would have gone with. Maybe you're too set in your ways, maybe the clique that you and my two aunts have gotten together is just so exclusive and routine that you can't function outside it......I don't know. I do know that your daughter flew in from Pennsylvania to see you, and you ditched her anyway. Not too smooth. Anyway, all that aside, I thought I'd take this opportunity to tell you how I feel about things.
Grandpa died almost 17 years ago. That much I'm sure you know. I remember mom crying in my dad's arms, a sight unusual for me. I'll admit, since I was only 9 at the time, my memories of him and yourself are fuzzy at best. I remember that it was a great time going to see you, I always looked foreward to it. . After that, I never really knew what happened. And I really don't care. Eventually, when the subject came up, I told people I had no grandparents left. I even adopted a surrogate grandparent, so I didn't feel so odd on grandparents' day at school. One time, my sister and I went to visit you and my other aunt, without my mom knowing. It seemed the thing to do, since you only lived 1/2 a mile away. You were polite enough, the way one might be with a casual acquaintance who stops by unannounced. But definately not the Grandma I had known. That was the last time I saw you. Not much of a relationship. And there wasn't even an excuse, like that you lived in Califonia or something.
So here I am, feeling somewhat torn. I'm not opposed to seeing you again, if that's what you want. But I really have this feeling that the only reason you want to see any of us is so you can meet your maker with a clear conscience or something. And if that's the case, fine, I really don't care. If you want to see everyone because you've had some type of revelation, well great. I'm glad for you. But, I'm going to learn from the experience of others. Let me tell you, I am a very busy person, as most people are. And the drive to where you live now is not exactly short. I just don't think I have time to drive all that way, and then be ditched. Besides, after 17 years of not talking, I guess I really don't have anything constructive to ask you. If I did go to see you, I have to admit, it wouldn't be for your benefit. It would only be so that I wouldn't ever have to regret not going. So, you're welcome to visit me if you ever care to, but don't expect to see me down there.
